Headline of the Day

So, Donald Trump has the Wuhan pangolin virus, and of course he does because it’s 2020 and how could he not have it? With this year, you take the most random scenario, you multiply it by 10, gobble a handful of the brown acid, and just go with it, and even then the whole thing spins even more out of control than you ever imagined. Now the question is what this all means for the campaign. I bet it helps Trump.

Joe Biden’s got to be worried. Well, Grandpa Badfinger‘s handlers have to be worried. That crusty crustacean is probably still napping, trying to sleep off the hangover from all the Namenda and crank they pumped into him last Tuesday to keep him upright for an hour and a half. In any case, change is frightening, and this changes the nature of the campaign. No one, including the Geppettos who pull Bidennochio’s strings, know what’s going to happen. Their Chauncey Gardner victory plan has been disrupted, and it’s not like they’ve got the most flexible candidate. Suddenly, Biden is not the only one who is going to try and do a presidential run from his house. And all the advantages Biden had of being able to hide and not being the center of attention suddenly vanish.

And all the problems associated with being in the spotlight vanish for Trump. While people who aren’t sissies enjoy Trump’s two-fisted, take-no-prisoners style, Trump fatigue is a real thing. He can be exhausting to the weak and squishy who sadly make up a substantial part of the electorate. This diagnosis gives him a chance to pull back, to chill a bit, and when he does that his approval tends to rise as his achievements speak for themselves.

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